Showing posts with label real stories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label real stories. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Real Couple Wednesday (Holly and Daniel)

I struggled to find a couple for this week. It seems I have exhausted the volunteers. I decided, even though I have a page on myself (my love nest) and on my wedding, it is time for me to answer these questions.





When did you know you were in love with Daniel?

Adam was about eight weeks old, and in the hospital. We had been dating for a total of two weeks, and he had been hands-on (the best he knew how) with Adam. However, when Adam hit the hospital for RSV, neither of us had ever been in a situation. Dan would come to the hospital right after school, and send until he had to go home. When the unthinkable happened; Adam stopped breathing and had to be airlifted by helicopter, we struggled with the fact that he could not come with me to the hospital to stay. However, he was the one person that would call every night, at exactly 9pm. He would ask how Adam was and make sure I was taking care of myself. This is when I knew I truly loved him. He was the rock I needed at a time I felt by myself. He showed me how much he cared.

What did you do on your first date?

For our first date, I was invited to go to his H.S. prom. However, tickets were sold out by the time we started to date. We went to dinner, and then he left to go to prom. I tease him now that he ditched me on the first date.

How did he propose?

He had his parents conspire with a plan to catch me by surprise. I was told to take Dan to the local lake to help him find his uncle to invite him for supper. When we got there and out of the car, we started to walk to where I thought his uncle was fishing. When we got to a bridge over looking the water, there were three roses with a ring tied to them on the ground. He regrets tying it to them now, he was shaking so badly. I will never forget how he said it; “Will you give me the honor of being your husband, and of having you as my wife?” Of course, I said yes…and then my sister and some of our other friends (who helped organize the whole thing) popped out from behind the trees.

For my wedding check out the wedding page of this blog.

What do you fight about the most?

This question is hard to answer. We fight about many different things, but not very much of one thing. We do fight over the house chores, lack of communication, money, and raising the kids. We don’t fight a lot, but just a lot of about many different things. Most of the time when we fight about something, it is resolved and on most occasions we don’t have to bring it up again.

Do you have a lot in common?

Not really. Dan and I are very opposite. However, this is part of the reason we marred each other. We can compliant each others strengths and weaknesses. As far as hobbies go, we don’t share a lot. We have tried mixing things up, and including a bit for each of us or adapting a hobby to be more suited for the other, but this has not worked well yet.






How often do you have sex? Do you have the same sex drive?

We do not have the same sex drive. If it were up to him, it would happen more often. For me, I could often care less. I feel as if it is just another thing on my to do list. However, the last few months have sparked a new connection with us emotional, and that has elevated each of our happiness with our sex life. It has now become 2-3 times a week. We both hope we can hold on to this trend.

What has been the hardest part of your marriage? the easiest?

The hardest part of our marriage is the unconventional roles we play in our family. He is a SAHD, and I work outside of the home. This cause friction between us, and the outside world (which then causes more problems for us). Because these are not the traditional norms, we have to give each other the appreciation and assurance that we are doing what works best for us. The easiest part of our marriage is our conversations and friendships. We can still, after eight years, have conversations for hours about all kinds of things. We can treat each other like friends, which makes our time together fun. We like to laugh, and can poke fun at each other in a teasing good time kind of way.

 How many serious relationships were you in before?

I have been in two serious relationships prior to Dan. I was in a four-year relationship with my first love that turned into four years of physical abuse. I thought I was going to marry him and have kids. I am thankful now that I did not, I would not have turned into the person I am today. The second was a quick fling marriage with a child. We were married for about nine months, and only together for a couple before we got married. Although it was quick, I did fall in love and get my heart broken.

There you have it…the microscope has been turned on me.


Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Real Couple Wednesday (Kristin and Steven)



The time has come again for Real Couple Wednesday. This week I interviewed Kristin. She was willing to share many things about her life. She gives a very open and honest picture about what it is like to be married in today’s time. Kristin is a follow writer, and if you want to read more from her check out her blog here:

I’m Just Saying…


Tell me about yourself (age, martial status) I am 44 and Steven is 37. We are married.

How long have you been married? 13 years

How did he propose? He got down on one knee, pulled a ring box out of his cowboy hat (he was a professional bull rider at the time) and handed it to me, asking me to marry him. When I opened it, it was a yellow Lifesaver (like in the commercial). Then he pulled the ring out of his pocket and put it on my finger.

Tell me about your wedding? Our wedding was just my parents, his parents, the preacher, and us. We wore kind of western wear and went to eat afterwards at Garfield's, then dancing at a local club that was having a western night. Five years later when my first marriage was annulled, we got married on our anniversary in the Catholic Church.

What do you fight about the most? Sex, money, and our kids (and not necessarily in that order)

Do you have a lot in common? Not really. Well, we do more now, I guess. We go to church together, we love doing things with our kids. But, we have a lot that isn't alike either, which at times causes a lot of tension in our marriage.

How often do you have sex? Do you have the same sex drive? We have sex 1-3 times a week. We absolutely do NOT have the same sex drive. We used to do it all the time (daily), but since my hysterectomy, I have no sex drive. While I know there are lubricants and all, seriously, not the same as being interested. Plus, he gripes so often about how little I want to (including accusatory comments that he denies are accusatory, and "jokingly" saying he's going to find someone else) that it makes me want to even less. However, when we do, it is generally fantastic.

What has been the hardest part of your marriage? The easiest? The hardest part has been losing one of our twin daughters at 3 months. While it pulled us closer in some ways, it has closed him down in others, it has also been something we struggle to communicate about, and even now which is almost 13 years later. The easiest part is when we forget all the B.S. that happens in our lives and we just relax and have fun. Anytime we do something with our kids, that's always easy. In our Venture River photo album on here, you can see us laughing on a ride. Those are the best times...when we forget the stress.

How many serious relationships were you in before? 2. My high school sweetheart, which was off and on from 6th grade through about 19 or so. He cheated a lot and got someone else pregnant. I was also married for 8 years.

Just an addendum, I know it seems I railed on Hubs a lot. I love him and cannot imagine my life without him. And thankfully, he is willing to do things he's not interested in to expose our girls to many things that I'm interested in. But he knows I will also do the same. So he goes to the Fox Theater to see Broadway shows and I watch wrestling. LOL.





Saturday, June 11, 2011

Long marriages: They are possible

Long marriages: They are possible

All too often, we hear articles about divorce. Divorce is a subject of many blogs, articles, and news reports. However, not everything has to be about divorce. There are couples that have lived through it all, that have made it their mission to be committed. Here are some inspirational couples to look toward when it gets tough to stay married even one more day.

Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher
 
This couple from North Carolina have celebrated 85 years of marriage. In this article, they say that the formula for a long marriage is faith, family and just a few big fights. If these two love birds can make it this long what is another year with your spouse. 

Bob and Nona Ballard
 
This couple from Oregon have been married for 74 years. This very happy couple shared some of their secrets in this news report. They seemed to have a very good time joking with each other. The good times and the bad. They say the secret to a long marriage is compromise.

Geoff and Pat Bunyan
 
As of today, the Bunyan's have been married for 62 years. When they celebrated their 60th anniversary they were interviewed my a paper. Their relationship started as friends, and pen pals. As their letters grew more intimate they fell in love on paper. It is a wonderful love story that should be the subject of a best seller.
 
 Daniel and Holly McDorman

Seeing these other couples just gives me more hope for my own marriage. We have been marred for almost seven years now. I am hoping we can someday celebrate a long and happy life together on someone's blog post about long marriages. 

Check these out: