Real Couple Wednesday (Ryan and Mindy)

 This Wednesday, I had the rare occasion when a husband decided to answer my questions. He is a friend of mine for some time now. His relationship is very long lived and full filled. I am very grateful that Ryan decided to be the first man to answer the questions. I am hoping that more husbands will step up and be willing to share their insights in their relationships. Ryan and Mindy have been together for a very long time, and have a little baby boy. Thank you Ryan for being part of Real Couple Wednesday.

Tell me about yourself (age, martial status)

I am 28 and have been married for about a year and a half.

How did he propose?

The way I proposed was wrapping a ring around a stuffed horse. (She hates horses and I thought this would change her mind about them)

 Tell me about your wedding?

Our wedding was perfect except for the pasture showing up 5 mins before the ceremony and left immediately after.

What do you fight about the most?

On the rare occasions we do fight it is usually about stupid stuff like money or one of us forgetting to do a chore.

Do you have a lot in common?

As far having things in common, we don't have a whole lot but that just means we each try new things.

How often do you have sex? do you have the same sex drive?

Our sex life has gone down some since having the baby but we do still have an active sex life I would say about once or twice a week.

What has been the hardest part of your marriage? the easiest?

The hardest part of the marriage would be raising our son; it had been just us for so long that when we added a new life we had to change just about everything we did. The easiest would be reaching a decision about things. We always sit down, talk about all the options, and decide what is best for us all as a family.

How many serious relationships were you in before?

I would say as far as "serious" relationships go, this is probably my first.

Finding the right cupcake for your wedding

Wedding cakes are out, and cupcakes are in. Embrace this new trend at your own wedding by finding the right cupcake display for your wedding. Cupcakes are fun and an easy way to give your guests the cakes they want. Using cupcakes can mean many more ideas and lots more fun then the traditional wedding cake.

A garden wedding

An intimate garden wedding could be beautiful. The cupcakes make an appearance that will make your guests smile. This is fun and unique.  Check out Garden Wedding Songs for some more ideas for this wedding theme.

Love Is Sweet

The Love Is Sweet wedding theme means having a lot of fun with candy and sweets. Cupcakes go great with this fun idea. Here are some beautiful cupcakes that embrace the theme. Check out this article for more about the Love Is Sweet wedding theme.

Twilight

If you have decided to make your wedding more Twilight style, try these cupcake ideas. Chocolate frosting and bright red would go great for the wedding. You can make the cupcakes with or without the books titles. Check out Twilight Inspired Wedding Dresses for some ideas for the bride.





Cupcakes can make your wedding unique and wonderful. Displaying them in an unique way is all up to you. Cupcakes are a sweet new trend for weddings.

Real Couple Wednesday (Christine and Michael Rice)

 The time has come again for Real Couple Wednesday. I interviewed Christine Rice. She is a fellow writer and was willing to share with us. She provided a glimpse into her life for everyone to see that you are not alone in the same struggles. I am very grateful that Christine decided to share with us.

Tell me about yourself (age, marital status).
I'm a 30-year-old married female.

How long have you been married?
6 years.

How did he propose?
He got down on one knee in our apartment and sweetly asked me if I would marry him.

Tell me about your wedding.
It was a small wedding of only about 10 people (just immediate family). The wedding and reception was held at my parents' house--the house I grew up in. The ceremony was performed in the front yard and it was the most beautiful early-July afternoon. It was truly the best day of my life.

What do you fight about the most?
Differences in perception. We're both stubborn and we each think we are always right.

Do you have a lot in common?
Yes. We went through similar situations before we met. However, we also have clear differences, and that makes life interesting.

What has been the hardest part of your marriage? The easiest?
Dealing with finances and disagreements is hard. However, our love for each other always resolves our arguments. The easiest has been our mutual feelings of emotional attachment and compatibility, which has made our marriage long lasting.

How many serious relationships were you in before?
Three. But this is the longest and most loving relationship I've had.

This week’s poll: why is the modern marriage not working

A long time ago, it was not unusual to find a couple that married young and stayed together. However, the odds of your marriage ending in a divorce are around 40%. Although this is down from the usual quoted ‘50%’, it does not mean a lot. There are many issues that married folks have to face. So why are so many marriages ending in divorce these days? This was the subject of our weekly poll this week. Why is the modern marriage failing? We got six people to cast their votes.

Cheating

60% percent of our voters believe the modern marriage is doomed to failure because of cheating. Cheating is always a major factor in choosing to stay together or not. Some women believe in giving their husband another chance even after the first affair. A woman cheating does not hit the headlines as often but that does not mean it does not happen. If you think your spouse is cheating, there may be many different reasons. Check out this article to learn more:

Cheating Spouses

Boredom

The next reason, according to the poll, is boredom. After spending years together, many couples may just get bored with each other. Maybe it has been awhile since you went out together, or since you laughed together. If this is the case, you spouse may find excitement else where, which can then lead to divorce. Boredom can really crush a relationship. Check this article out for some help:

Tips on Keeping Excitement in your relationship

Expectations too high

Often times we may think that our spouse is just not measuring up. Many women have their ‘ideal’ husband picked out long before she meets Mr. Right. If there is a good man in front of them, they may decide not to be with them because they are not exactly everything they imagined. If your expectations remain too high, you can doom relationship before it starts.  Learning to adapt these expectations are crucial. Check out this for help:

Relationship Expectations: Being Realistic About Happily Ever After

These were the results of our weekly poll. How did you vote? If your previous relationship did not work, Why?

Real Couple Wednesday (Kristin and Steven)

The time has come again for Real Couple Wednesday. This week I interviewed Kristin. She was willing to share many things about her life. She gives a very open and honest picture about what it is like to be married in today’s time. Kristin is a follow writer, and if you want to read more from her check out her blog here:

I’m Just Saying…


Tell me about yourself (age, martial status) I am 44 and Steven is 37. We are married.

How long have you been married? 13 years

How did he propose? He got down on one knee, pulled a ring box out of his cowboy hat (he was a professional bull rider at the time) and handed it to me, asking me to marry him. When I opened it, it was a yellow Lifesaver (like in the commercial). Then he pulled the ring out of his pocket and put it on my finger.

Tell me about your wedding? Our wedding was just my parents, his parents, the preacher, and us. We wore kind of western wear and went to eat afterwards at Garfield's, then dancing at a local club that was having a western night. Five years later when my first marriage was annulled, we got married on our anniversary in the Catholic Church.

What do you fight about the most? Sex, money, and our kids (and not necessarily in that order)

Do you have a lot in common? Not really. Well, we do more now, I guess. We go to church together, we love doing things with our kids. But, we have a lot that isn't alike either, which at times causes a lot of tension in our marriage.

How often do you have sex? Do you have the same sex drive? We have sex 1-3 times a week. We absolutely do NOT have the same sex drive. We used to do it all the time (daily), but since my hysterectomy, I have no sex drive. While I know there are lubricants and all, seriously, not the same as being interested. Plus, he gripes so often about how little I want to (including accusatory comments that he denies are accusatory, and "jokingly" saying he's going to find someone else) that it makes me want to even less. However, when we do, it is generally fantastic.

What has been the hardest part of your marriage? The easiest? The hardest part has been losing one of our twin daughters at 3 months. While it pulled us closer in some ways, it has closed him down in others, it has also been something we struggle to communicate about, and even now which is almost 13 years later. The easiest part is when we forget all the B.S. that happens in our lives and we just relax and have fun. Anytime we do something with our kids, that's always easy. In our Venture River photo album on here, you can see us laughing on a ride. Those are the best times...when we forget the stress.

How many serious relationships were you in before? 2. My high school sweetheart, which was off and on from 6th grade through about 19 or so. He cheated a lot and got someone else pregnant. I was also married for 8 years.

Just an addendum, I know it seems I railed on Hubs a lot. I love him and cannot imagine my life without him. And thankfully, he is willing to do things he's not interested in to expose our girls to many things that I'm interested in. But he knows I will also do the same. So he goes to the Fox Theater to see Broadway shows and I watch wrestling. LOL.

Long marriages: They are possible

Long marriages: They are possible

All too often, we hear articles about divorce. Divorce is a subject of many blogs, articles, and news reports. However, not everything has to be about divorce. There are couples that have lived through it all, that have made it their mission to be committed. Here are some inspirational couples to look toward when it gets tough to stay married even one more day.

Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher

 

This couple from North Carolina have celebrated 85 years of marriage. In this article, they say that the formula for a long marriage is faith, family and just a few big fights. If these two love birds can make it this long what is another year with your spouse. 

Bob and Nona Ballard

 

This couple from Oregon have been married for 74 years. This very happy couple shared some of their secrets in this news report. They seemed to have a very good time joking with each other. The good times and the bad. They say the secret to a long marriage is compromise.

Geoff and Pat Bunyan

 

As of today, the Bunyan's have been married for 62 years. When they celebrated their 60th anniversary they were interviewed my a paper. Their relationship started as friends, and pen pals. As their letters grew more intimate they fell in love on paper. It is a wonderful love story that should be the subject of a best seller.

 

 Daniel and Holly McDorman

Seeing these other couples just gives me more hope for my own marriage. We have been marred for almost seven years now. I am hoping we can someday celebrate a long and happy life together on someone's blog post about long marriages. 

Check these out:

 

Couple talk: tips for a long marriage

Top ten reasons my husband and I will last forever

This week’s poll: what do you fight about?

This week’s poll: what do you fight about?

During this week’s poll, I asked my readers what they fight about the most with their partners. I was surprised how much the answers varied. We got seven votes. There were two votes for money, sex, and chores. One person answered other. I can only imagine what that means, or maybe we do not want to know. I was very pleased to see that no one fought about kids.  I find that a bit unusual because I do fight with my husband about the kids. However, that is not what we fight the most.

Money

Fighting about money is very common. I know that on payday, my husband and I will get into a fight. We have very different spending habits. Even though we can agree on what is the difference between needs and wants, there is still a lot to argue about. If you find yourself fighting a lot about money, read this:

How to stop fighting about money

Sex

Sex is can be a big issue in a relationship. Whether it is too much, too little or no desire, fighting about sex can influence your relationship greatly. During and after sex your body releases feel good hormones that forces your bodies to connect and makes you feel closer. If your libidos don’t match, which can happen for various reasons, you may find you are fighting about sex often. One of the reasons you sex life could be lacking is a disease.

Fibromyalgia and Sex

Chores

Fighting about chores may be more common then everything else. I find it difficult for my husband to do chores without reminding him constantly. I think this is because he suffers from ADHD, which makes it difficult to do housework without getting distracted.  If this sounds familiar for anyone there are some tips for trying to get things done while suffering from ADD.

Tips for doing housework while suffering from ADD

What do you and your partner fight about? Maybe you can find another way to communicate.