In sickness…

My husband and I have been married for almost seven years. During those seven years, the words ‘in sickness’ have found new meaning for our marriage. I regret that I have been sick, really sick, for most of our marriage. Once I was in the ICU with no feeling in my left side. I had to learn how to walk and talk all over again. As if this was not enough, now my body just aches all of the time. He has been patient with me, and very supportive during what he can. Although, I know sometimes a person’s health can impact a marriage extremely. I am very grateful that my husband has stuck through the sickness part of marriage. It can not be easy.

Understanding illness

Being sick can mean a lot of things. This can be about anything from a cold to a life-altering injury. Whatever happens to your partner it is important to understand the illness or injury. When I was sick with conversion disorder, a mental health disorder that caused the loss of feelings in my left side, the illness itself it hard to understand so explaining it to my husband was difficult. He listened to the doctors and the other family members that were helping us. Other illnesses and injuries may not be as hard to understand. Understanding the illness or injury will give you a better idea on how to help.

Listen

The best way to help your spouse is to listen. If you illness is visible or not, it is real and causes a big impact in their life. Listening actively means not judging the other person for how they feel. Listening involves great body language, and eye contact. The best way to show your spouse you are listening to have gentle physical contact, if able. Touch a knee or hold a hand. Remember that there is no right or wrong feelings for illness.






Get ready for a new normal

In the ideal illness situation, things get better. However, this may not be the case. You need to be prepared for a new normal. Realizing that you will still love your spouse and they will still love you is the best way to be prepared. Make a game plan together in case a situation arises that may have to be dealt with. Having a plan for emergencies will make your new normal easier to handle.

I am really grateful for my husband and any other married couple that has to deal with illness. In the vows, “in sickness or health” few couples think about the sickness part

Read these:

Little known signs of Vitamin B12 deficiency

Coping with Undiagnosed Illness

Animal Lovers and Relationships

Having an animal means you already have a child. This furry friend depends on you to take care of them just as much as a child would. Although, you may be less hesitant to pull out pictures of your furry babies then your human ones, it does not make them less important. Dating a person with an animal puts a unique spin on your relationship. The classic “Must Love Dogs” symptom is not too cliché in the slightest and there are many things you need to consider before dating someone that has furry babies.

Do you like all animals?

You may prefer certain animals, but an animal lover loves their pets just as much as anyone else. Before you date someone that has pets or loves animals, ask them which kind of pet they have and make sure you can form a bond with that pet.

Can you live with the animal?

The ultimate prize for a relationship is to get married. Being married usually means sharing a house. It may be different for you between liking, loving and living with your significant other's pet.

After you have asked yourself these questions, there are other things to consider about a relationship that involves pets. Loving a pet lover can bring about unique date ideas.

Walking the dogs

Playing with the cats

Visiting animal shelters together

These are just a few ideas for dates if you are dating an animal lover. Finding a date that involves animals or pets is a great way to break the ice with someone new. This also brings up the animal issue very easily and comfortably.

The greatest fear of an animal lover falling in the love is the aspect of the other person not loving their animals. They are children, and are part of a package deal. If you find yourself falling in love with an animal lover but have the dreaded ALLERGIES there are things you can do. Do not give up on a relationship that has potential. There are medicines you can take, or have your significant other groom the pet more often. Solutions can be found.

 Read more about relationships and animals here:


Would You Give Up Your Pet for a Relationship

How to Date a Dog Lover

Long marriages: They are possible

Long marriages: They are possible

All too often, we hear articles about divorce. Divorce is a subject of many blogs, articles, and news reports. However, not everything has to be about divorce. There are couples that have lived through it all, that have made it their mission to be committed. Here are some inspirational couples to look toward when it gets tough to stay married even one more day.

Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher

 

This couple from North Carolina have celebrated 85 years of marriage. In this article, they say that the formula for a long marriage is faith, family and just a few big fights. If these two love birds can make it this long what is another year with your spouse. 

Bob and Nona Ballard

 

This couple from Oregon have been married for 74 years. This very happy couple shared some of their secrets in this news report. They seemed to have a very good time joking with each other. The good times and the bad. They say the secret to a long marriage is compromise.

Geoff and Pat Bunyan

 

As of today, the Bunyan's have been married for 62 years. When they celebrated their 60th anniversary they were interviewed my a paper. Their relationship started as friends, and pen pals. As their letters grew more intimate they fell in love on paper. It is a wonderful love story that should be the subject of a best seller.

 

 Daniel and Holly McDorman

Seeing these other couples just gives me more hope for my own marriage. We have been marred for almost seven years now. I am hoping we can someday celebrate a long and happy life together on someone's blog post about long marriages. 

Check these out:

 

Couple talk: tips for a long marriage

Top ten reasons my husband and I will last forever

Online Dating: does it really work

Online Dating: does it really work

We have all seen the commercials of ‘real’ couples that are matched up on the online dating sites such as eharmony. com or match.com. However, if you ever had the time to read the fine print at the bottom of your screen, it says ‘results not typical.’ So, what are the typical results? Well, I thought I would find out. My brother-in-law recently has had his heart broken and has decided to give the life of online dating a try once again. He has been trying this scene on and off for about four years with no real results. His chosen method is plentyoffish.com. Because of lack of finances, or the lack of faith, he is not subscribing to an upgraded profile. However, to give him some help, I did some research.

I found this article about Online Dating Tips for Men. I then helped him write his profile out, and then help him respond to a few girls he was attracted to. His name is Travis and he is 22. Although he is young, he is very eager to find a lasting relationship. He sees my marriage every day and thinks of it only as a reminder that he is alone. His is heart is still repairing itself from a hard breakup, but he wants to move on. Travis has agreed to allow us to follow his journey on the online dating scene to see if it works. Read here for more updates. Has anybody else found success with online dating?